I really hate movies where the solution to the girl's relationship troubles is that the guy is afraid to fall in love. that feelings scare him. I mean, what the fuck is that? since when does love work that way. "I want to be with you but I'm scared." I understand that part, mostly. rejection is a terrible prospect, especially when it's someone you really and truly love.
but why is the solution to just stop giving a shit?
what? wait, what? who made that okay? "I can't stand all the pain, so now I just don't let it affect me." bullshit. "I just don't care anymore." no no no no no no why? is indifference a better state of being? you can't just adopt indifference as the answer, and you can't call sadness a useless emotion just because crying will slow you down.
people don't cry because they're sad. they cry because they're frustrated. you know what's frustrating? bottling shit up. "numbing the pain for a while will make it worse when you finally feel it." oh, how cheesy, blah blah blah, I don't even feel pain because I'm so strong.
no, you're stupid. robots are boring. robots aren't people. don't become alcoholic and promiscuous to push all those feelings down, because you're just so casual and you just don't- shut up! I want you to care! I want you to admit that you're angry when you're angry and you're happy when you're around her, is that too much to ask?
Saturday, June 11, 2011
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
l'espirit de escalier
it's like it all rushes out of you in a breath, your words your thoughts your objections to their very voice, and instead comes out "oh great cool" and "yeah sure yes" and assent that you don't mean,
just because you don't want to be mean?
because you don't know if you have enough tact or if you care enough that they'd get annoyed or just because you freeze up scared
and then later you think of witty things you could have said, like "shut up, you arrogant bitch" and "no I will not do what you want again because I want to fucking do this tonight."
you could have said all that but you didn't. and then the moment's gone and you're left with just frustration.
if you bring it up later, you're just obsessive. right? maybe you shouldn't object to your friends as much as you do and you'd be less angry.
just because you don't want to be mean?
because you don't know if you have enough tact or if you care enough that they'd get annoyed or just because you freeze up scared
and then later you think of witty things you could have said, like "shut up, you arrogant bitch" and "no I will not do what you want again because I want to fucking do this tonight."
you could have said all that but you didn't. and then the moment's gone and you're left with just frustration.
if you bring it up later, you're just obsessive. right? maybe you shouldn't object to your friends as much as you do and you'd be less angry.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)